Not having the internet is great! 

Today when I got home from work there was a single brown and black barred feather on the north mattress and I thought it must be from some cat toy, but I couldn’t think of what.  Then I romantically imagined that one of my aesthetically inclined pets must have found it outside and, noting its beauty, brought it in for me to enjoy after a grueling day of school.  In the kitchen there were more feathers, a lot more, all over the place.  And then I saw, on the floor by the trash, our longbeaked friend from a few days ago, the little chirper who was hopping around the back rock wall.  I don’t know what kind of bird, it looks exotic to my eyes, but hopefully just because it is native to washington and not nebraska.  I feel like I remember it from our bird lab in biology a few days ago, some sort of tern.  I will look it up.  I feel awful and keep wondering if maybe Juliette just found it dead outside.  Of course, every single one of its tail feathers has been pulled out.  My little hunter I guess.  None of it was eaten and it wasn’t in that bad of shape, just dead.  I could almost think it had died outside and they found it.  I don’t know.  It looks as if Judy left it entirely alone.  Which is good because in a few hours I am taking her up to the school where she is going to help me do childcare with kids while their parents take some sort of class and I’d hate to find out she was a killer/mauler the day I introduce her to a bunch of kids.

When you move out of your college pad of over a year and up to your parents house 3 hours away, you narrow down all of your stuff: “do I reaally need this many clothes I never wear, kitchen appliances I’ve never used, broken electronic equipment that I could probably do something really cool with, furniture I got out of the trash, etc. etc. etc.  Then when you move out of your parent’s house to drive across the country to a new place where you’ve never been and will be staying in the guest bedroom of your supervisor, you narrow your stuff down a lot more.  You only bring the BEAR essentials (intentional misspelling for humor purposes).  Clothes that fit and that you can wear to work.  Dishes, towels, a single chair, your computer, only 2 boxes of books, your dog and cat and their assorted sundries.  Then, it is nearly October when you finally get your own place.  It’s been since July 31^st that you last slept in a bed that was yours without having to say “thanks” to anyone but yourself for picking out such a sweet place and sheets.  (That’s a long time!)  You’ve still only got the bare essentials, your trailer is completely empty.  The two boxes of books didn’t amount to much on the shelf.  You plug in your computer for the first time in 2 months, almost on a whim.  You don’t need it anymore, but maybe you could play some tunes for the unpacking process.  And your computer desktop has EVERYTHING YOU’VE EVER PUT ON IT STILL IN THE SAME PLACE!&#  I don’t need this shit!  My desktop literally only has 2 columns left of bare space on the far right that isn’t covered with icons.  I feel like a million tons of bricks just landed on me.  I want to fdisk my computer.  All I really need is my music, which is nearly all on my mp3 player.  Oh and my pictures and my internet favorites.  Sigh  I’m not dealing with this right now.

I figured out why my posts fucking suck lately: it's because I put my xanga address on my facebook profile and I was so busy censoring myself that it was lame.  So I fixed that and restored my xanga to it's treasured status of bitchfest/obscenity laced journal/inappropriate things that I thought of or did recently.

Speaking of inappropriate things I thought of or did recently, here's a couple:

• used my work computer and internet to read stupid news, check my facebook, and write on my xanga
• moved into a trailer that has been uninhabited for the past year because previous tenants so trashed it that the landlords decided against restoring it and renting it out anymore. 
• slept on a mattress found in said disgusting trailer which I justify because it only has one large discolored stain and it is near the foot of the bed anyway.
• took a shower without a shower curtain because I don't have one yet

It's so stupid the stuff that I have and don't have, like I go grocery shopping I come home and I think I'm all completely stocked up, I spent 3/4 of my food stamps and bought a lot of good organic foodstuffs. Then this morning for breakfast I was going through my cupboards and I've got no coffee (although I did spend an hour picking out a coffee maker), no sugar even if I did, so I thought "toast!", but I've got no butter.  No eggs, no salt, no pepper, no frying pan, but I do have cheese for egg mcmuffins and sausage.  I've got milk but no cereal.  I've been using comet as dishwashing soap and my water is so hard that even if I use scalding hot water, the dishes just don't dry.  I left some cups out on a towel after washing them last night and this morning they were still wet!  Not just a little either! 

Alright, I've still got 5 minutes left in my lunch hour so some more shit that is going on with me is that I am living the simplest lifestyle, it is so weird.  I never wanted to be one of those people with no stuff and who have clean bedrooms just because there ISN'T anything to be lying around, but I am!  My walls are completely covered with tapestries, posters, pictures, 3d reliefs of swordfish, etc. but for furniture I have a mattress in my room and a lamp on the floor next to it and that's all.  In my living room I have 2 twin mattresses on the floor and a couple milk crates as chairs, plus this weird display cabinet with a mirror in the back that I put my books on and my one chair that I brought all the way from Omaha.  All of my furniture is stuff that was left in this trailer, btw.  I'm calling it "the Long Hall" btw, like, "I'm having a bbq at the long hall if you want to come" or "let's head back to the long haul and check on Judy" ALSO!  I'm one of those lucky people who gets to leave their backdoor open all day while they are at work so the dog and cat can come and go and it is cool, there isn't anyone around who is going to come in and I trust them to not get hit by cars (fingers crossed, knock on wood)

So that is what is going on. 

P.S. I miss you guys. 

in washington

I am in washington, the drive was really long and really fun and everything so far is great!  The people whose house I'm staying at are very nice and their puppy is very cute (5 month old yellow lab).  That is not a very good update, but I'm on my work computer for the first time and can't think of a whole lot to say.  Wenatchee is beautiful, I need to take some pictures.  The school is cute and I am very excited to start working with the kids, which will be in about 2 weeks because I have orientations first.  It already feels like I've been here for a really long time, but its only been 2 days. 

Here's something, my whole life I've turned over all of these new leaves you know, and they never work out, but I didn't even intend to and I've turned over a couple of good ones already. When you are staying in your supervisor's house it is easier to do the things that good people do, like be clean and make your bed and not watch t.v. or be on their computer and walk your dog and read all those books you've been meaning to read.  I hope I'm not jinxing myself, but I've been rather productive which is new and exciting. 

I guess what I'm saying is that I'm very very boring and things are really really good.